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[dirtdevil]

[ ah shit, here we go again ]

Comments

[usurpers]

[ whenever levi wakes up from his magic coma, nurses would probably let the captain know that he always had a visitor. a young dragon, by the looks of the last time they saw him. he’d sit there, hang around, talk a little occasionally, then politely bow out to return to whatever duties he had. sometimes, there’d be trinkets. mostly enchanted cleaning products.

today was no different! a tall horned man with plenty more features to count walks in, dawning a jacket in the summer months— because it actually snowed. crazy.

eren slips into the room he was used to walking into, acknowledging the nurses there, but before they could say anything to surprise him, what he sees is more than enough. wide slit eyes stare blankly, a touch of relief softening up the muscles around his cheeks, but not enough to shred the serious look on his face. ]

Captain.

enchanted cleaning products you say

[dirtdevil]

[ don't you hate when you get The Magic Flu™ and end up all but dead to the world for like an entire month? yikes.

between the haze of sickness and the general weirdness of the situation, it takes him more than a little bit to regain a solid grasp on reality. is this what a hangover feels like?

(he can't get drunk, you see. poor bastard.)

anyway, the fact that there's a fucking dragon person in his room doesn't help. he recognizes Eren despite the drastic changes, but it still kind of seems unreal. he tries to blink away the crazy, but it doesn't work. shit. ]

When did you turn into a lizard?

[ is he joking? it's really hard to tell sometimes. ]

he knows his captain

[usurpers]

[ at least he looks okay for someone who has been bedridden— iron ackergenes, those are. eren’s expression doesn’t falter, but!! but. he is trying to determine if he should answer it literally or carry it along like a joke.

best to keep on the safe side. ]

These last full moons were, [ uh ] notable, sir.

[ he’s had the most changes yet. ] How’re you feeling?

[dirtdevil]

Notable. Good to know.

[ what does that even mean. he's too tired to ask right now. ]

Like a reanimated corpse. Except the person who did it was complete shit at it.

[ can't even get a reliable necromancer around here, sheesh. ]

Modranicht gift

[thejoyrider]

[The package left on his doorstep contains a plate of homemade cookies from Marie and a fresh lily flower.

“Happy Holidays! We are not friends yet but I hope we can become friends in the coming year.” is what the attached note says]

un: jaeger

[usurpers]

Do you remember the last time you were here?

[dirtdevil]

[ you mean it wasn't all just a long, weird dream?? ]

yes?

[usurpers]

And the last thing you remember from home, it's the same?

[dirtdevil]

yeah.

though jean filled me in a little.

[ very heavy emphasis on "a little." ]

text | un: kirstein

[trost]

[ check in... hi. even if Levi thinks Jean is talking to him already. ]

Captain.

Your status?

[dirtdevil]

status? i'm fine if that's what you're asking.

you really don't need to talk like that to me, for the record.

[ nerd. ]

[trost]

[ wow he wanted to be a serious military boy ]

Oh. [ A bit awkward. He also realises now that he's here that he doesn't actually know what to talk about. ]

Good to hear that you're doing alright. Did those pixies give you any trouble?

[dirtdevil]

you mean aside from being annoying as fuck? not really. what about you?

audio

[stopfen]

Hey... [Can he tell how awkward she feels asking for help and advice from him? There's a pause, but then she changes track. Why ask for help when she can just annoy him.

So he's sent a shakily recorded video clip. Showing a completely devastated room, just mud everywhere. Not long after, another item is sent...A photo. A photo of a very proud looking boy. Tail wagging so hard it was a blur.

She'd originally planned on asking the clean freak for advice on how to deal with the dried mud stains. But then...it seemed funnier just to make him look.]

[dirtdevil]

[ ...ah. it literally pains him to look at this. why. ]

Very nice. Have fun with that.

[stopfen]

[She doesn't record her grumble at the lack of grouchy old man. But they are THERE.]

I was thinking I'd leave it...He seems so happy.

[dirtdevil]

[ hey, it's not his house and he doesn't have to go over there. far be it from him to demand she cleans it up. ]

Like a pig in shit.

Audio - the most shitposty thread - during basement cleaning

[stopfen]

[It's late, very late when he gets sent the call. And it's... With a slurred and shaky voice that couldn't keep level. ]

Where am I?

[Still on the sofa of the basement owners'. But she was Lost and needed an Adult. ]

[dirtdevil]

[ good thing he barely sleeps anyway. ]

...Mikasa?

[ he knows it's her—her ID is right there—but she sounds... not right. he's actually a little alarmed. ]

What's going on? Did something happen?

[stopfen]

I don't... The ceiling is moving... [She pauses, taking that in. Hand waving up like that would shove it back, flinging a cushion across the room. ] I can't feel my hands.

[dirtdevil]

[ ooookay, THAT's not good. first things first— ]

Can you describe where you are? Is it safe?

[ he's already leaving. not that he's worried or anything. ]

forward-dated to modranicht

[tothemetal]

Having only spoken once, you'd think Levi would have managed to successfully avoid a stupid holiday gift. Wrong.

The box is fairly large beneath its clumsy wrappings, but its contents are thankfully simple: a bag of chocolate-covered coffee beans (extra dark) and a step stool. It's a very nice step stool, obviously well-crafted...but it's still a fucking step stool.

There's an obvious insult to be read into this, but the hand-drawn card slipped into the package negates the possibility with its sincere message and almost childish depiction of a cozy hearth. The mantle is crooked because Styx can't draw a straight line to save his goddamn life. ...sorry, Levi.

modranicht

[stopfen]

[Levi is one of the few people to get a note with his present. Partly because he was one of the only people she didn't need to struggle with enchantments to make it readable.]

I made too many hats for the kids so here.

-Mikasa

[Said hat, was black with a pompom as big as his head. She 100% doesn't care, he's just getting this because she made too many, really!]

modranicht

[usurpers]

[ a delivery to levi's residence would reveal, once he opened it, a custom tea set, along with a victorian-era roomba. it cleans all by itself, and it has an attack mode. thanks for being a peach.

even though eren didn't actually know that's what it said. there's no note to trace him back, otherwise! ]

Modranicht gift

[thejoyrider]

[On the day of the holiday, a plate of homemade cookies and a sample of herbal tea mysteriously appears on his doorstep. The wrapping is decorated with a fresh lily flower (actually a Fae magic product, designed to fade away from existence in a few hours) and a ribbon. The attached handwritten note reads as follows:]

Happy Modranicht! Let’s have another great year here in Aefenglom!

M⚜️