[ please understand that if this was anyone else in the entire universe shedding skin all over his shit, he would be intensely grossed out. but it's not anyone else—it's Erwin, which means not only is he not grossed out at all, he's also quite distressed. they've been spared from any weird afflictions so far in this place, but it seems like that luck might have finally dried up. pun not intended. at all.
he doesn't mind changing the sheets; he'd much rather change the sheets constantly than not have Erwin next to him. plus he probably already changes the sheets a ridiculous amount because he's fucking weird. it's fine.
that said, while he has been sleeping a million times better next to Erwin, he hasn't slept well since this particular ailment cropped up. he's just worried.
he's always kind of worried one morning he'll wake up and Erwin will be dead again.
he does eventually sleep, but he's a light sleeper when he does sleep, so it's not difficult to wake him up, especially if you're Erwin. almost immediately his eyes are open and he's propped himself up to see what's going on. ]
Wh—
[ it takes him a moment to really wake up and figure it out, but it's clear enough from the way Erwin is staring at his hands.
hands. plural.
he just stares at them too, eyes wide with disbelief, at a loss for words. ]
[ even though levi doesn't seem to mind, erwin still feels bad, okay? he knows how levi feels about Things Like That so it's kind of given him a temporary complex.
it's completely forgotten in light of what's going on right now though. the way levi echoes his own sentiments even if erwin isn't swearing even in his own brain.
speaking of his brain, it's kind of screaming now that it's catching up and levi can probably feel it. it's not panic, but it's something he doesn't quite understand, and his breath sounds strange a moment before he can make himself say anything. ]
I don't know.
[ erwin very rarely doesn't know things, but it's been happening more and more often lately. he stares at his hands a moment longer, then stretches out his right arm. wiggles the fingers. turns in bed. uses that hand to touch levi's face.
[ if Erwin doesn't know, probably nobody else knows either. that's pretty much how he used to live his life. once Erwin was gone, then...
well. no one would ever replace him, no matter what he might have insisted in life. it doesn't matter.
so Levi is not even trying to work it out in his head—partially for that reason, and also because then Erwin touches his face, with his right hand, and it feels like a fucking hand. it's warm and clean and attached to the rest of him.
holy shit.
he reaches up to cover Erwin's new hand with his own, and it feels like a hand from there, too. he's incredibly confused but it doesn't matter: he smiles, and presses Erwin's hand closer against his own face. ]
Huh. No pain or anything?
[ he'd feel it if there was, but he asks anyway. just to be sure. it just seems too good to be true. ]
[ and that is what it is. just a hand. but it's so strange and astounding and erwin is honestly really overwhelmed by it: he's only ever regretted not being able to hold levi properly and now he can. a whole new world of being to wrap both arms around him is here, and he takes another slightly rough breath before he answers levi's question. ]
No. No pain at all.
[ then they're a goddamn tangle on the bed because erwin wraps both arms around levi and drops them back onto the mattress, not even doing anything like kissing him frantically or anything because he's too busy burrowing in against him and gripping the back of his shirt with two entire fully working hands. ]
[ he's barely opened his mouth to express relief at the lack of pain when suddenly he's back lying down and Erwin's arms—arms!—are around him. he's never once wished for something like this; he's so incredibly grateful to have Erwin back in the first place that he's never even entertained the imaginary notion of what it would feel like to have two arms around him instead of one. why would he? the only person he wants has only one arm, and it's not like Erwin can just spontaneously grow back his other arm.
...unless.
his arms curl around Erwin too, and he leans into him, just taking in the feeling for the first time. there are so many things Erwin could have chosen to do immediately upon realizing he had two arms again, and this is what he chose.
[ it's something they'd never thought to imagine possible but here they are, erwin with both long damn arms curled around levi, hands shifting to press flat to his back, pressure and weight and something close to desperation to just keep feeling now that he can.
and levi's wrapped around him too. it's honestly, full stop, the best thing that he's ever felt.
he manages to even himself out, huff out a breath, and answer. ]
I thought nothing could ever be better than wrapping my arm around you. I was wrong.
he makes a sound like a scoff, but it's less of a scoff and more like the sound of the wind getting knocked out of him by that absolutely ridiculous statement. ]
That's so lame.
[ but there's still a smile in his voice, and for some reason he holds him a little closer anyway. ]
[ actually, it goes far beyond being a sucker and far beyond being an Ackerman, too. what could it be. it's a mystery. ]
...It's nice, though.
[ also an understatement. can they just stay here like this for the entire day? this is way more important than whatever he has going on today, guaranteed. they have a lot of time to make up for. ]
[ mildly. he sighs but it's not a bad thing, just comfortable and easy. he shifts, lifting a hand (one of two!) to brush fingers through levi's hair while the other one stays wrapped around him. having two hands is amazing, actually.
he tucks their foreheads together, eyes lidded. ]
It is nice. I like this.
[ a severe understatement. he'd be perfectly happy staying here the entire day. ]
[ the feeling of one arm around him and one hand in his hair is kind of surreal. he's never been anything less than deeply thankful for every moment he's been able to spend with Erwin regardless of how many limbs he has, but this feels like even more of a blessing.
he's pretty sure he doesn't deserve it. (Erwin does, though.) ]
[ levi deserves it. he's always deserved it, all that erwin can give him and more, and he's so goddamn happy to do this not even for himself, but that he can give levi this. that's how his dedication runs, apparently.
selfless, when it comes to levi.
he considers the question a moment before shaking his head. ]
I'm already doing it.
[ smooth. then: ] After that, I'm not sure. I never thought about it.
[ he clicks his tongue in pretend-disappointment, which incidentally is the only kind of disappointment he's capable of feeling in Erwin. ]
What a shame.
[ he says this, but meanwhile he's briefly disentangling himself on his left and Erwin's right so he can take Erwin's brand new hand and thread their fingers together. ]
[ then levi is moving around and threading their fingers and he huffs out a breathless sound, squeezing levi's hand and just looking down at them with fascination. a little like he can't believe his eyes. ]
It's definitely something, I agree. Something I very much enjoy.
[ he smiles one of his smiles only Erwin ever gets to see, and gives his hand a squeeze in return. ]
Me too.
[ then he pulls their hands over to his mouth and presses a grateful kiss to the tops of Erwin's new fingers. if only good things happened to this guy more often. ]
[ his smile softens a little, as if he could get any softer. he just feels a little like he's melting in the happiness department, and he wiggles his fingers in wonder just after levi kisses them. ]
I never thought I'd be able to do something so simple. [ a breath. ] I probably just keep repeating myself, but I don't know if I've been this astounded since we told each other how we feel.
[ nothing will ever be able to warm his heart like Erwin's smile. it's almost like nothing else even matters compared to this. he's happy for Erwin for having his arm back, but he's even happier for the fact that it makes Erwin happy.
it's impossible not to smile back at him. ]
Honestly, that might have been a little more astounding for me. No offense, but I've already seen someone regrow their arm.
[ in fact, he'd have already seen Erwin regrow his if he'd... well.
[ yeah, that's really fucking romantic, actually. it definitely still counts. he leans in a little more to the resting against each other, voice low when he murmurs. ]
Every moment I think about how lucky I am to have you.
[ look, he's just being honest. even the most ineloquent person in the whole world is bound to say something romantic at some point if they're as as hopelessly in love as he is.
he breathes a contented sigh. ]
Then I guess it's a good thing you'll always have me.
[ it means so much to hear that, even though it was never Erwin's decision to leave him in the first place—that choice was his own, and if he had to do it all over he'd make the same one again.
good thing he'll never have to do it all again.
...right? ]
You'd better not, if you know what's good for you.
[ as if it was Erwin's fault; fortunately Erwin knows he's full of shit. he kisses Erwin's cheek and then somewhat reluctantly pushes himself upright to look out the window— ]
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he doesn't mind changing the sheets; he'd much rather change the sheets constantly than not have Erwin next to him. plus he probably already changes the sheets a ridiculous amount because he's fucking weird. it's fine.
that said, while he has been sleeping a million times better next to Erwin, he hasn't slept well since this particular ailment cropped up. he's just worried.
he's always kind of worried one morning he'll wake up and Erwin will be dead again.
he does eventually sleep, but he's a light sleeper when he does sleep, so it's not difficult to wake him up, especially if you're Erwin. almost immediately his eyes are open and he's propped himself up to see what's going on. ]
Wh—
[ it takes him a moment to really wake up and figure it out, but it's clear enough from the way Erwin is staring at his hands.
hands. plural.
he just stares at them too, eyes wide with disbelief, at a loss for words. ]
—What the fuck?
[ okay, almost at a loss for words. ]
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it's completely forgotten in light of what's going on right now though. the way levi echoes his own sentiments even if erwin isn't swearing even in his own brain.
speaking of his brain, it's kind of screaming now that it's catching up and levi can probably feel it. it's not panic, but it's something he doesn't quite understand, and his breath sounds strange a moment before he can make himself say anything. ]
I don't know.
[ erwin very rarely doesn't know things, but it's been happening more and more often lately. he stares at his hands a moment longer, then stretches out his right arm. wiggles the fingers. turns in bed. uses that hand to touch levi's face.
then, on a breath, reverent: ]
I can feel it.
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well. no one would ever replace him, no matter what he might have insisted in life. it doesn't matter.
so Levi is not even trying to work it out in his head—partially for that reason, and also because then Erwin touches his face, with his right hand, and it feels like a fucking hand. it's warm and clean and attached to the rest of him.
holy shit.
he reaches up to cover Erwin's new hand with his own, and it feels like a hand from there, too. he's incredibly confused but it doesn't matter: he smiles, and presses Erwin's hand closer against his own face. ]
Huh. No pain or anything?
[ he'd feel it if there was, but he asks anyway. just to be sure. it just seems too good to be true. ]
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No. No pain at all.
[ then they're a goddamn tangle on the bed because erwin wraps both arms around levi and drops them back onto the mattress, not even doing anything like kissing him frantically or anything because he's too busy burrowing in against him and gripping the back of his shirt with two entire fully working hands. ]
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...unless.
his arms curl around Erwin too, and he leans into him, just taking in the feeling for the first time. there are so many things Erwin could have chosen to do immediately upon realizing he had two arms again, and this is what he chose.
it makes him smile. again. ]
Well? How is it?
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and levi's wrapped around him too. it's honestly, full stop, the best thing that he's ever felt.
he manages to even himself out, huff out a breath, and answer. ]
I thought nothing could ever be better than wrapping my arm around you. I was wrong.
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he makes a sound like a scoff, but it's less of a scoff and more like the sound of the wind getting knocked out of him by that absolutely ridiculous statement. ]
That's so lame.
[ but there's still a smile in his voice, and for some reason he holds him a little closer anyway. ]
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[ matter-of-fact. a beat passes. ]
You also still love me even if I'm lame, so what does that make you?
[ sure, he's still overwhelmed, but levi's arms are around him and for fucking once, he can return the favor properly. ]
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Yeah, yeah. I guess it makes me a sucker.
[ actually, it goes far beyond being a sucker and far beyond being an Ackerman, too. what could it be. it's a mystery. ]
...It's nice, though.
[ also an understatement. can they just stay here like this for the entire day? this is way more important than whatever he has going on today, guaranteed. they have a lot of time to make up for. ]
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[ mildly. he sighs but it's not a bad thing, just comfortable and easy. he shifts, lifting a hand (one of two!) to brush fingers through levi's hair while the other one stays wrapped around him. having two hands is amazing, actually.
he tucks their foreheads together, eyes lidded. ]
It is nice. I like this.
[ a severe understatement. he'd be perfectly happy staying here the entire day. ]
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he's pretty sure he doesn't deserve it. (Erwin does, though.) ]
What's the first thing you wanna do two-handed?
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selfless, when it comes to levi.
he considers the question a moment before shaking his head. ]
I'm already doing it.
[ smooth. then: ] After that, I'm not sure. I never thought about it.
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What, you never thought you might just suddenly regrow a new arm one day? I thought you were supposed to be a genius.
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[ he turns his head enough to kiss his temple. idle, affectionate, lingering. ]
I suppose we could come up with some things to do.
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What a shame.
[ he says this, but meanwhile he's briefly disentangling himself on his left and Erwin's right so he can take Erwin's brand new hand and thread their fingers together. ]
There. That's something.
[ it's a big deal, actually. ]
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[ then levi is moving around and threading their fingers and he huffs out a breathless sound, squeezing levi's hand and just looking down at them with fascination. a little like he can't believe his eyes. ]
It's definitely something, I agree. Something I very much enjoy.
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Me too.
[ then he pulls their hands over to his mouth and presses a grateful kiss to the tops of Erwin's new fingers. if only good things happened to this guy more often. ]
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I never thought I'd be able to do something so simple. [ a breath. ] I probably just keep repeating myself, but I don't know if I've been this astounded since we told each other how we feel.
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it's impossible not to smile back at him. ]
Honestly, that might have been a little more astounding for me. No offense, but I've already seen someone regrow their arm.
[ in fact, he'd have already seen Erwin regrow his if he'd... well.
anyway. ]
The other thing, not so much.
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[ and yeah, we're not going to focus on that other part. keep those thoughts out of your mind, levi ackerman.
he sighs but it's contented, dipping his head to kiss levi's temple. ]
I hope you're used to that part by now, though. Me loving you.
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Not at all. I still think I must be dreaming every time I wake up next to you.
[ every once in a while he'll say something romantic. usually it's by accident, but it still counts. ]
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Every moment I think about how lucky I am to have you.
[ a breath. ]
I'll never get tired of that feeling.
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he breathes a contented sigh. ]
Then I guess it's a good thing you'll always have me.
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[ mildly. adoring? definitely adoring. then his voice softens even further. ]
I'll never leave you again.
1/2
good thing he'll never have to do it all again.
...right? ]
You'd better not, if you know what's good for you.
[ as if it was Erwin's fault; fortunately Erwin knows he's full of shit. he kisses Erwin's cheek and then somewhat reluctantly pushes himself upright to look out the window— ]
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