he was asleep, to be fair. Erwin's idea to share a room has been a good one: his anxiety in general has lightened significantly, even if he can't quite explain why. most nights, he sleeps okay—maybe not well, but okay, which is still an improvement.
some nights, though... whether it's the insomnia still hanging on or the bizarre unsettling nightmares that have started to wake him up in the middle of the night, some nights he still isn't getting much sleep. tonight is one of those nights, though he's not sure if what he dreamed was really a nightmare. it didn't leave him with the same kind of uneasiness they usually do, but it was so evocative and full of detail that it still wakes him up, leaving him restless and staring at the ceiling, wondering what the fuck it's supposed to mean.
oh, and also Erwin was in it. that's a new one for him.
speaking of, when he hears Erwin wake with a start he sits up in his own bed as well, quickly enough that it probably makes it obvious he was already awake. ]
Erwin? You okay?
[ there's also no real trace of lingering sleepiness in his voice. he's been lying there for awhile, it seems. ]
[ was asleep seems to be the order of the night, of course. it doesn't take long for erwin to realize levi is awake even before he starts to move, which is absolutely insane, why would he know levi's sleeping breathing rhythm so well that he doesn't need any other indication?
he sets that aside to think about later when his head's not full of: cotton, weird memories (thoughts) that he has no idea of the source of, and a throbbing ache.
when levi speaks though, he looks up and straightens. with anyone else he would have straightened up immediately upon realization, but for some reason, it's alright to take it at a normal pace with him. he'll think about that later too. ]
I'm alright. I just had a strange dream and I wanted to get my thoughts together before trying to sleep again.
[ 'hey, me too! actually you were in it and I tried to murder you, isn't that crazy? fortunately I had some kind of gay awakening and decided I'd follow you to the ends of the earth instead. weird!'
yeah, he's just going to keep all of that to himself. ]
I don't know if I'd call it a nightmare. Intense is a better word for it, I think.
[ erwin is also keeping the 'you were in my dream and tried to murder me but had a gay awakening and decided you'd follow me to the ends of the earth instead. also i was super duper into it' to himself. for now. ]
I'm not sure what to think of it. It was much more detailed than my dreams normally are.
[ he makes that clear, at least. he just needs a second to really figure his shit out first. it's weirder if he refuses, he figures, since he's just a dream. dreams are dreams are dreams.
after a sigh, he looks over at levi, gaze lingering on him. ]
A different life, I suppose I could describe it as. You were there, but things were different from how we actually met.
[ the eyes widening thing is interesting and he tilts his head slightly before continuing. but he does continue, attempting to not look too deeply into levi's reactions. ]
It had the feeling that we hadn't known each other for very long yet. I wanted you to join my cause, and you wanted to kill me.
he doesn't need to ask for more details. could Erwin have had a dream that was similar but ultimately unrelated to his? sure, maybe. but that's not what happened—he's not sure how he knows this, but he knows.
for a moment, he says nothing, completely unprepared for an answer like that. when he does find his voice, he still doesn't really know what he's supposed to say. ]
[ if erwin had suspicions of something like that, of having identical dreams or even dreams at all being the cause of both their wakefulness, he doesn't actually say so. his own eyes widen, just slightly, at levi's admission.
he tilts his head, considering the new information, processing, and then: ]
Huh. [ 'huh,' really? even erwin doesn't know what to think about something? that's genuinely kind of crazy. ]
I wonder if there's an outside cause. I don't know why there would be, though.
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he was asleep, to be fair. Erwin's idea to share a room has been a good one: his anxiety in general has lightened significantly, even if he can't quite explain why. most nights, he sleeps okay—maybe not well, but okay, which is still an improvement.
some nights, though... whether it's the insomnia still hanging on or the bizarre unsettling nightmares that have started to wake him up in the middle of the night, some nights he still isn't getting much sleep. tonight is one of those nights, though he's not sure if what he dreamed was really a nightmare. it didn't leave him with the same kind of uneasiness they usually do, but it was so evocative and full of detail that it still wakes him up, leaving him restless and staring at the ceiling, wondering what the fuck it's supposed to mean.
oh, and also Erwin was in it. that's a new one for him.
speaking of, when he hears Erwin wake with a start he sits up in his own bed as well, quickly enough that it probably makes it obvious he was already awake. ]
Erwin? You okay?
[ there's also no real trace of lingering sleepiness in his voice. he's been lying there for awhile, it seems. ]
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he sets that aside to think about later when his head's not full of: cotton, weird memories (thoughts) that he has no idea of the source of, and a throbbing ache.
when levi speaks though, he looks up and straightens. with anyone else he would have straightened up immediately upon realization, but for some reason, it's alright to take it at a normal pace with him. he'll think about that later too. ]
I'm alright. I just had a strange dream and I wanted to get my thoughts together before trying to sleep again.
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[ 'hey, me too! actually you were in it and I tried to murder you, isn't that crazy? fortunately I had some kind of gay awakening and decided I'd follow you to the ends of the earth instead. weird!'
yeah, he's just going to keep all of that to himself. ]
Was it a nightmare?
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[ erwin is also keeping the 'you were in my dream and tried to murder me but had a gay awakening and decided you'd follow me to the ends of the earth instead. also i was super duper into it' to himself. for now. ]
I'm not sure what to think of it. It was much more detailed than my dreams normally are.
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...eh, fuck it. ]
What was it?
[ and then, hastily, because maybe he shouldn't have been so forward— ]
—Uh, if you want to talk about it, I mean.
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[ he makes that clear, at least. he just needs a second to really figure his shit out first. it's weirder if he refuses, he figures, since he's just a dream. dreams are dreams are dreams.
after a sigh, he looks over at levi, gaze lingering on him. ]
A different life, I suppose I could describe it as. You were there, but things were different from how we actually met.
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his eyes widen, but probably not for the reason Erwin thinks. ]
What?
[ okay, so they both had a dream about each other. so what? it's not that weird, right?
...well, that depends. ]
What was I doing?
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It had the feeling that we hadn't known each other for very long yet. I wanted you to join my cause, and you wanted to kill me.
[ he sounds almost wry, self-deprecating. ]
You almost did.
[ almost. ]
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well, ain't that some shit.
he doesn't need to ask for more details. could Erwin have had a dream that was similar but ultimately unrelated to his? sure, maybe. but that's not what happened—he's not sure how he knows this, but he knows.
for a moment, he says nothing, completely unprepared for an answer like that. when he does find his voice, he still doesn't really know what he's supposed to say. ]
Erwin, I think we had the same dream.
[ what the fuck does that even mean? ]
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he tilts his head, considering the new information, processing, and then: ]
Huh. [ 'huh,' really? even erwin doesn't know what to think about something? that's genuinely kind of crazy. ]
I wonder if there's an outside cause. I don't know why there would be, though.